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A TEACHER RECOUNTS THE STRUGGLES OF HIS FRANCOPHONE COLLEAGUE WITH ENGLISH The difficult, sometimes amusing and even embarrassing moments caused by ‘false friends’ are many and varied.  We

all have our personal sottisier, or gag-reel compiled over the years, and the internet actually (even actuellement) provides lengthy lists that we might eventually (even éventuellement)

consult.  TIPS FOR GETTING A (FRENCH) WORD IN EDGEWAYS Such a simple things the pronoun – ‘you’ – that can be used in English to address a cat as well as a king, divides into two in French

(and into three, four or more in other languages) and you need to know which to use when. Then you come across a sentence such as Devant les accusations, il s’est tu, and realise that even

the basic word tu has more than one meaning. Take that useful power source, the battery, for example. The French batterie tends to refer to larger ones, while pile is reserved for smaller,

domestic ones.  This is true of many words, both in French and in English, which means that the problem (and embarrassment) of so-called ‘false friends’ (faux amis) goes both ways. A French

colleague with limited English, invited to lecture in the US, was in New York when he found that his radio needed new batteries.  WHY BON IS ALWAYS A GOOD WORD TO USE IN FRANCE By going to

Macy’s department store, he thought he could pick up what he wanted without the awkwardness of having to speak.  Searching around, he was approached by a salesgirl, so he asked: ‘Do you ’ave

piles?’ At her obvious discomfort, he blurted out: ‘I mean, do you ’ave electric piles?’ In Paris he had been used to a having a break during his two-hour lectures, known as un intercours.

He took advantage of this practice when asked a question by a female student to which he could not give an immediate response.  Already abashed, since it was not the practice in France to

interrupt a lecture, he switched to impromptu English: “Yes” he blustered (and I leave you to imagine the French accent), “I will answer your question, but first we shall have ten minutes’

intercourse.”  Inevitably, the students fell about laughing. That was a couple of decades ago.  Nowadays, the unfortunate lecturer would be lucky to escape with his skin or, at best, lengthy

explanations before the moral authorities of the university or an even higher legal tribunal.